This was a quite weekend. Things have started to get better since the split. I can tell William still has troubles with mom not being home but it has gotten better. On Saturday he found a picture of his oldest sister T and brought it to me. He was crying so I asked what was wrong. He told me that he missed his sister. I told him that I missed her too. I tried to make sure that he understood that he still gets to see her when he is with his mother and that is OK to miss her. I told him that I hoped one day I would get to see her again too.
It has been so hard on me helping raise her kids for more than half of their lives and now not being able to see them anymore. It is hard to walk by their rooms and see the empty walls. It is kinda like my heart just feeling kinda empty. I remember teaching J to read. Reading stories to all of them every night before bed. We read some great books. The first week they were in my house I read them my favorite book "Where the Red Fern Grows". I remember M telling me that she was glad that I was going to be her step dad that night. I was surprised by that because I thought she would be the toughest one to let me into her heart. It will be hard this year not seeing T in marching band. I was also looking forward to seeing her go to prom. I would have been a prod papa watching her graduate.
One of the most frustrating things for me in all of this is seeing just how little she knows about taking care of William. She let me do everything for four years and now that she is gone she really doesn't know how to take care of her own son. His numbers comeback so high and so low. I am afraid every time he goes there. It took time for me to get good at this but it is really hard for me to see her having to go through the learning curve that I went through years ago. It is nice to finally have a break from getting up every night and to not have to think about his diabetes once in a while but I would be happy to do it all for his whole life just so he didn't have to go through all of this.
OK enough venting for today. My focus is on William and making him happy. School is coming up quickly and he is really looking forward to that. Right now we spend a lot of time at the park and playing video games together. We spend time every night snuggled up on the couch watching a movie or Disney Channel before bed. He is just learning to read. He is pretty good at it when he wants to try. I just have to say "sound it out". He likes to guess at what the word should be vs actually sounding it out. He is amazing and I let him know it everyday.
Keeping our heads up,
His Loving Dad
It has been so hard on me helping raise her kids for more than half of their lives and now not being able to see them anymore. It is hard to walk by their rooms and see the empty walls. It is kinda like my heart just feeling kinda empty. I remember teaching J to read. Reading stories to all of them every night before bed. We read some great books. The first week they were in my house I read them my favorite book "Where the Red Fern Grows". I remember M telling me that she was glad that I was going to be her step dad that night. I was surprised by that because I thought she would be the toughest one to let me into her heart. It will be hard this year not seeing T in marching band. I was also looking forward to seeing her go to prom. I would have been a prod papa watching her graduate.
One of the most frustrating things for me in all of this is seeing just how little she knows about taking care of William. She let me do everything for four years and now that she is gone she really doesn't know how to take care of her own son. His numbers comeback so high and so low. I am afraid every time he goes there. It took time for me to get good at this but it is really hard for me to see her having to go through the learning curve that I went through years ago. It is nice to finally have a break from getting up every night and to not have to think about his diabetes once in a while but I would be happy to do it all for his whole life just so he didn't have to go through all of this.
OK enough venting for today. My focus is on William and making him happy. School is coming up quickly and he is really looking forward to that. Right now we spend a lot of time at the park and playing video games together. We spend time every night snuggled up on the couch watching a movie or Disney Channel before bed. He is just learning to read. He is pretty good at it when he wants to try. I just have to say "sound it out". He likes to guess at what the word should be vs actually sounding it out. He is amazing and I let him know it everyday.
Keeping our heads up,
His Loving Dad
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