Monday, June 29, 2015

He Learned to Ride a Bike

Riding My Bike
    I have been working with William for the last few weeks to learn how to ride his bike. I took the training wheels off of his bike at the end of last summer. I told William that he was old enough to ride a bike without training wheels. He told me he wanted me to put the training wheels back on and didn't touch his bike again for the last few weeks of summer. He told me that I should sell his bike because he didn't want it anymore. This year I got him out on his bike a few times but he kept telling me that he was afraid and that he would fall. We kept trying but he wasn't ready. This last week he finally learned to ride. He told me that his sister worked with him to get him to ride. She made him feel safe and helped him until he learned. Then when he finally did get moving then he told me that his bike was too small. I gave him his older brothers old bike. It was a perfect fit for William and off he went. Now he tells me that he deserves a new bike because he learned to ride. Maybe next year.

On my New Bike
    I am glad that he is past that hurdle. That is a major milestone that he crossed. He wants to ride his bike everywhere now. I guess it is time to get my bike fixed and back on the road. I need some new tires and new tubes. I was glad to see that my chain had been repaired. I broke it the last time I took that bike out for a ride with the family. It had just been sitting there collecting dust because I still thought the chain was broken. I guess the bike fairy must have fixed it. I would like to get my bike fixed so that William and I can take great adventures on our bikes. He especially wants to ride to get ice cream. We are blessed in our neighborhood to have bike trails going everywhere. It also give us a chance to have my lady come along too.

Sunset and Fireworks
    We finished off the weekend with fireworks. It was a lot of fun lighting off fireworks and seeing William smile. He asked me when we were going to be able to do that again because he had so much fun. I am blessed at the things that I have and the things that have happened over the last year. We have come a long way in a year and I am glad that William and I both have some great things to smile about again. We had to celebrate early because I do not have him this year for the forth of July. That is Okay because we had a wonderful time together putting on a show for Jen. William told her that he was the firework shooting guy and he was glad that he got to put on a show for her. Is this a possible new career? Time will tell.

    We also got to spend the weekend with William's oldest sister. We had a lot of fun and got to meet her new boyfriend. He seemed like a really good kid and seems to be heading in the right direction. It was so good to see his sister again and to just sit and talk. The three of us got a little too much sun but I was smarter with William as he was the only one with sunblock on. We got William to go on six water slides for which he earned ice cream. He even earned two dollars for going on a different ride. After a little time in the arcade, we said goodnight and went home. William was so happy to see his sister again and so was I.

What an amazing fun weekend together,

Your Loving Dad

Friday, June 26, 2015

We made it to summer

    We made it to summer and things are going pretty well for us so far. Daycare is going great for William. He is having fun with his friends and seems to be getting along with everyone and just having fun. They had a water balloon fight and eventually just started squirting each other with the hose when it was taking too long to fill the balloons. When I picked him up he was still muddy and his towel was soaked. I got to take home a wet boy for a father's day weekend. We spent part of the weekend with the robotics team. We are making changes on the robot and trying to get ready to go to our next competition. Then we had some time together and William made me a cute chart that he had done at daycare that was all about me. The spelling was a little off but the comments were awesome.

    He moved up to the second grade class in church. He tells me that is not as much fun as the old class because they don't get to play as much. They also do not have an air hockey table in this new room so I am told. He tells me he likes going to his old church. That is the church that we go to. The new church is the one that his mother goes to. It was white but now it is grey and it is boring. You have to love the mind of a kid. I am glad that he wants to go to church. I may not believe in all of that but I want him to have a choice and I am willing to sit and listen even if I do not believe in what I hear anymore. I guess life has a way of showing you what is real and with everything that has happened to me I find it particularly had to believe in a God that would let a father beat a son his whole life, have an uncle that molested him for many years, or to have a cheating mother tell you she is leaving you because God brought this man into her life. There is something really wrong about all of that, especially a woman that thinks that cheating was Okay and that God made it possible to cheat. Last time I checked the bible says that adultery and stealing were sins. I guess that is the new bible version at her new church.

    I got an amazing unexpected surprise this week. William's oldest sister reached out to me and told me that she wants to meet William and I and just catch up. We are going to Michigan's Adventure with her and her boyfriend this weekend.  I am really looking forward to it. I am glad that she respects me enough to still want to keep in touch with me. I miss her and the other two very much. I was worried that William might tell his mother so I asked her if she was Okay with her mother knowing, and she told me yes. I am looking forward to this weekend and I hope things go well.

    On the job front. My company was just bought by the Chinese government. I am now working for a communist government. I really do not feel good about that. I don't like how they trample on the civil rights of the people that live in China. They tell us nothing is going to change but they always say that. I guess that is what being a manager is all about. Telling people what they want to hear instead of telling them the truth.  Time will tell.

    My goal this summer is to make this summer about William and my beautiful lady. I want to go and have some fun and just make some new experiences that let us become closer. This weekend Michigan's Adventure and then we have the robotics competition in just a few short weeks.

I enjoy every miniute with you my dear son,

Your Loving Dad

Friday, June 19, 2015

William is officially a second grader and Freddie Fernortner is fun to read.

    I got notice from the school this week that William was officially promoted to second grade. I wasn't sure he was going to make it with everything that had happened this year. His report card was really good for every class that was not with his home teacher. It seemed that he got along with all of his other teachers pretty well. He just had a hard time listening to the home room teacher. I am glad to see him move forward. We are going to have to hit things really hard right off the bat for next year. Get him doing the right things and letting him know very strongly that things like he did this year will not be tolerated.

   William is a very loving and sweet kids. He likes to hug and help others. This sometimes gets him in trouble because he wants to be up and helping even if he was not asked to do it or he was busy doing work. It makes me very proud to see him hug another student or to have another student run up and hug him. I know that makes him feel good inside when this happens.

    We have started a new book series with William and he really seems to be enjoying them very much. We are reading the Freddie Fernortner Series. He is the fearless first grader that is smart and has great adventures and the only cat in the world that chews gum and blows bubbles (Mr. Chewy). In the first book he and his friends build a flying bike. The second book was the Super-Scary Night Thingy. We are on the third book right now. It is about a haunted house. There are twelve books in total. Right now I have William read a chapter and then I read two. I want to have William reading two chapters and me reading one by the end of summer. I am also hoping to make it through all twelve books. He really seems to be excited about reading them every night. I think he also identifies with him being a first grader.

Here are to the many adventures that you are going to have in real life and in books,

Your Loving Dad

Tuesday, June 9, 2015

The last day of First Grade

    It is the last day of first grade. It has been a long year and I am glad to see you finally get there. I really hope next year is a more successful year for you. You had lots of trouble adjusting to everything going on in your life this year. I want you to know that I am proud or you for making it through. I look forward to seeing you have friends and getting excited about going to school next year. It is now time for us to have some fun for the summer. You need to learn how to ride your bike. I know it is scary to you right now but you will look back some day and laugh that you were afraid to ride your bike.

    I have a few trips planned especially now that I have five weeks of vacation. We should be able to do all kinds of fun things this summer. I still want to take you to Disney. Now that things are going great again in our lives. Some big things are coming around the corner. I know that you will be excited for these changes. We will be talking about them soon. Your life is just going to keep getting better as long as you try.

I am proud of you for making it through first grade,

Your Loving Dad

Thursday, June 4, 2015

How to get him to do the right thing?

    My biggest worry in life right now is William. I have many reasons to worry. The type one diabetes, celiac disease and now ADHD along with dealing with the fallout of everything his mother did to our family. William has a hard time at school with sitting still and listening. He also has a problem with acting out on occasion. I lose sleep at night worrying that he will make the right choices the next day, the next week and for the rest of his life. That is a lot of weight to take on. I can manage the diabetes and celiac for him, for now. It is totally up to him to make the right choices at school and daycare.

    I have tried many things to try and motivate him to make good choices. So many days in a row without hitting and he can play video games. That worked for a while. Getting scores above 80% at school. They rate his behavior every half hour. That is a story all in itself. That works some of the time. This week I started something new again. For each day we start off with a goal. The goal has a few parts. First he get to pick a number that he believes that he can achieve the next day. He usually picks 85%. On really good days he will tell me that he is going to get 95%. Then we pick an activity that he is rewarded with if he achieves above 80%. I have been doing this the last three days with great success. Two days ago his goal was 80%. The reward was ice cream for his 8:00pm snack. The first day he got 81% and ice cream. The second day he wanted ice cream again. He got 85% and we went to a local ice cream place and got an ice cream. Today his goal was 86% and he wants to go on a motor cycle ride with me. I will let you know how that turns out.

    The way this system works is we talk about the goals at night after we finish reading.  What score and what reward he will receive.  I talk to him about it again while he is eating breakfast the next morning and then again when I drop him off at school. The morning ritual is; what is the number? What is the reward? How are you going to get to your goal? We talk about not hitting, listening to the teacher, doing his work and a list of a few other things. I tell him that I am proud that he is going to have a super day, that I love him and to have fun at school. I want to plant into his head that he is going to have a good day before he even goes into the building. I really hope this system keeps working. I will let you know. We are transitioning to summer. He will still be going to daycare on my side so there will still be structure in his life. I hope we have fun this summer and that William makes progress with his feelings.

I am rooting for you buddy,

Your Loving Dad

Monday, June 1, 2015

Last Week of School

    Well this is the last week of school. This has been a tough year for you. I am glad to see this year come to an end and I am very hopeful for the next year. We have some work to do over the summer to get you ready for next year. I am hoping a little more time will show you that you cannot act the way you did this year. Hitting someone is not OK. Not listening to the teacher says is not OK. I know that you have had so much to deal with in your young life. I am sorry for my part in that, but you have to step up and become a better person in spite of everything that has happened in your life. You need to find strength inside yourself to be a better person. You need to choose to find joy where maybe there is none at the moment. I am there to hold your hand and help you get there and I will love you no matter what.

    We have had some fun times over the last few weeks. I am trying to show you if you work hard there is a reward. For now the reward is ice cream or a trip to Craig's Cruisers or maybe even a new pair of shoes. We need to get you thinking about what you lose if you do not think before you act. I can not tell you how I look forward to the smile report at the end of the day. I am hopeful that I will see many happy faces on the report and I will be able to tell you good job. It seems that those days are far between right now. I know you want to do a good job at school but you do not regret what you do until after it is too late. I hate to see the frown faces and the sadness that I know it brings you and me both. I know there is a sweat heart inside of you because I see it all of the time.

    I see your heart when I pick you up from daycare and I see you hug the much younger kids on the way out the door. I see them come to you and give you a big hugs. I know that must make you feel great. I know it makes me smile to see them come to you. I can see the trust and the love for an older kid that shows them respect and friendship. I do not understand why you can not seem to do the same thing when it come to others your same age. I believe that it is because you want to be in charge. When someone else wants to be first or gets to lead you are somehow hurt inside and you lash out. It is OK for someone else to be in charge once in a while. I do love your independent nature. I know that will make you a leader someday.

    It is time to take the summer off, let the pressure of the school year go by and have some fun, but we must not forget the lessons that we have learned from this year. I am really looking forward to doing fun things with you over the summer. I hope that you get to have a lot of fun with both of your families.

Time for a break from the pressures of school and just be a kid,

Your Loving Dad

A Story by William

William's letter about Lucky     William sat down yesterday an wrote a letter about Lucky our dog. He wanted me to publish it. So ...